LOMBOK WEDDING CEREMONY

Lombok has a traditional wedding ceremony that still indigenous and still holding bu leaders of the villagers from generations to generation, although the modernity still have hard pressure to release the culture unpredictable, it probe like some Lombok people use prasmanan as their common ceremony and use kecimol as music than Gendang Belek. The transformation have been done in Lombok Culture to serve the interested ceremony that keep the cultural. 

This ceremony was established by the local people when the kingdom era still running and it continued until now but some of the highest budget for this ceremonial was released due to ability of the people economic that not supposed about, from this time i will explain about the wedding ceremony that started from the young man and woman make a new partnership and other unwritten rule that to obey :

1. Midang 

This a particular of approach for partnership between man and the woman, this process will be done for night, the man will visit the woman home at night to do conversation and approached to close the connectivity from heart to heart, this process actually still using until now and this an interesting moment that the young man waiting for. But this process can not for the whole night due to the each village has the rule for this moment, the man can not visit the girl until 10.00 pm, this rule was strongly keep the woman secure from other issue. 

Unwritten rule most powerful that the law of indonesian right fue to the all villagers respect and responsibility what they hold about, if some of the visitors try to break the rule by continued visit the woman home until the time that stop and the host will bring out from the women home and they will forbid the man to come for next time, in fact we will see the effects of this rule that to understand about sleeping time and to respect with the woman parents for tomorrow activities. 

2. Kidnapped the woman

The extremely process that the man will kidnap the woman by night and bring out from man family that no body will know about where the woman bring to, this process without or with parents agree about his daughter choices is not can be break the process, actually this process was agreed by woman and man to make a huge statement to get married. 

From the first night until the third usually they will stay on man family without sleeping together and the family should be protected a couple from unexpected accident from them, after two or one days the news will come to the both family that his family was kidnapped and will get married soon.

After that news was acknowledged by the both family a couple will be pick them up continue to bring to the man family by villagers this time usually after 3 days stay count from the night kidnapping. 

The man family will prepare anything to inform the woman family about the happy news that call Nyelabar, nyelabar is a moment when the man family or leader villagers inform the woman family about the marriage process and they built a communications for the next ceremony that waiting for.

3. Asking For Wali and Maskawin

Asking for wali in an islamic wedding process the the man family will ask the woman parent especially her father to visit the akad nikah as a wali for his daughter, the wali position can be changed with other closer family based on a reasonable like death, in foreign countries, sick or have problem on mentality, another option they can use Wali Hakim based on term and conditions. 

For Maskawin under the woman mother authorities for how much the Maskawin asking is no need bargain for the total amount, if the woman has the first wedding or bachelor state without any wedding before it the Maskawin depends to her mother but for second and next depend to the woman directly. Maskawin is a gift from the man to the woman as wedding gift even with gold, silver, money, land, home or car,

4. Akad Nikah 

After the get Wali from the woman family and the Maskawin has the total amount the it time for the man family to prepared 

Anything for akad nikah ceremony that fully appreciate from the whole village to be a witness of wedding, this a great islamic process for wedding and this moment that will allow a couple to be man and wife and the bridge and bridegroom get a book of wedding or buku nikah that be a wedding prove by religious and laws of government. Finally time for main ceremony.

5. Nyongkolan 

Nyongkolan is a main wedding ceremony that fully with villagers activities, by the night all young man and woman come through the home ceremony to prepare the ceremony for tomorrow, this time for villagers to present their self one to each other, in the night villagers cooking, frying, grill or prepare any for the whole night, a music come through this moment, all wedding invitation was sent 3 days before ceremony by the name pesilak or menyilak, it means that the leader of villager to inform the wedding ceremony will done on the specific time fron home to home that not using wedding card like now. 

The night before ceremony we call bedang that the time to prepare the whole facility, equipment and tools for wedding ceremony, here the important thing to prepare about : 

1. Bridge and bridge make uper

2. Costume 

3. Wedding facility 

4. Gamelan or music for nyongkolan

5. Home decoration 

6. Other tools and equipment that support to the wedding. 

The main day we waiting for, the guest welcoming by the host and say congratulations for wedding, the whole ceremony will take much long time till the all guest finished the main dish that serve by buffet lunch, in the afternoon around 04.00 pm that time for Nyongkolan to visit the woman home with many villagers.

Nyongkolan will perform a gamelan music follow it, a traditional dancer, bridge and bridegroom traditional and other followers that hold various fruit basket, a beautiful view will shown on the main roads watched by the people across the road out. 

The loud music of gamelan and the bridge follower will stopped in the place that close to woman home that time for bridge and bridegroom to asking for allowance and blessing from their woman parent.

Finally a couple of wedding back home from the long ceremony.